Bullet Points: The Spy Who Loved Me

Besides enjoying the hell out of the 1977 James Bond film The Spy Who Loved Me I have always thought it was one of the best titled in the series (and of course I know it was taken from the title of Ian Fleming’s 1962 novel that only shares the name but not the story.) I, along with millions of others, have gotten so much entertainment from 007 that I am glad to find out that my love is not unrequited anymore. Super spy James Bond not only loves me, but he loves us all. And what a film for him to show us his love! The Spy Who Loved Me has thrilling action, a top-notch Bond villain and even ol’ Jimmy has his very own spy to love in the comely Agent Triple X. All this amorousness has gotten me in the mood and it is time for me to share the love so join me on a journey to The Spy Who Loved Me.

• Affectionate Synopsis: Both the British and Soviet Navies have nuclear submarines mysteriously disappear. Realizing that neither country was involved the two enemies agree to work together sending their best agents to find and stop any disaster. As an aside, this period of detente with the British and Soviets working together was great to see on the big screen during and actual time of relative warmth during the Cold War before it started to freeze up again in the 1980s. The British send James Bond (Roger Moore, For Your Eyes Only) while the Soviets send Maj. Amasova also known as Agent Triple X (Barbara Bach, Street Law.) The man behind the shenanigans is Karl Stromberg (Curd Jürgens) a wealthy crackpot who, surprise surprise, wants to destroy the world.

• Loving Introductions: We first meet Triple X in bed with her lover and fellow Soviet spy who just happens to be called away on a mission in Austria that involves James Bond being in bed with another undercover Soviet spy. (I need a cigarette after that sentence.) Bond is forced to escape by skiing down a mountain all the while being chased by Soviet agents. He manages to evade them with deft skiing and it doesn’t hurt that his ski pole doubles as a gun. The climax of the chase involves famed Bond stuntman Rick Sylvester skiing off a cliff only to have a parachute (a Union Jack parachute to boot) open up allowing 007 to escape. Did I mention that Bond kills the spy who happened to be the paramour of Triple X? Intrigue! Spoiler alert, it makes Triple X mad for a little bit but she eventual succumbs to the machismo of James Bond.

• Solicitous Villains: Stromberg loves the ocean and believes that man has been damaging the planet and it is time to start over. He has one of the all-time great water based lairs called Atlantis which can both submerge and float. It has large windows allowing Stromberg to view the aquatic surroundings and also happens to have some captive sharks in case he needs to dispose of any unwanted visitors. Stromberg also has the Liparus in his fleet, which is a tanker that can open up its hull to eat up submarines and is the setting for an explosive battle. The Liparus fight scenes and stolen subs is similar to the stolen spacecraft and volcano base fight in You Only Live Twice except on water. Stromberg’s number one henchman is the imposing Jaws (Richard Kiel, Force 10 from Navarone) whose most distinguishing feature is his set of metal teeth. Jaws deals with Bond and Amasova throughout the film until a final train car tussle reminiscent of Live and Let Die and From Russia with Love.

• Devoted Action: The action set pieces in The Spy Who Loved Me are some of the best in the series because of the beautiful backdrops and unique stunts. I have already mentioned the skiing and spectacular jump, but not far behind in terms of excitement is the car chase cum submarine chase in Sardinia. The Spy Who Loved Me is known for the appearance of the famous Lotus Esprit that Q has expertly engineered with the ability transform into a submersible. 007 and Triple X are fleeing in the Lotus from Stromberg’s men who have motorcycles with rocket power sidecars, cars, and even a helicopter that can’t stop the car. Bond then drives right off a pier into the water and we see the car transform and propel underwater only to be attacked by more of Stromberg’s men. Watching the nonplussed beach goers when the Lotus drives out of the water and onto the beach is worth the price of admission. For those that like more historical action pieces, Egypt and the Great Pyramids of Giza provide some of the most awe inspiring backgrounds to action in film, plus we get to see Bond riding a camel!

The Spy Who Loved Me is one of the best love stories. That is if you like your love stories to include enthralling action scenes with the world’s greatest spy. There is so much more action and intrigue that were not included in this Bullet Points, not because I am lazy but because the movie is so jammed packed with engorged goodness that I couldn’t fit it in. (That is not a problem 007 had with Triple X.) My only suggestion is that if you have never seen The Spy Who Loved Me go watch now and if you have already seen it go watch it again. I will leave you with some Bonus Bullet Points, not because it is what is expected but because I love you.

• The music for The Spy Who Loved Me was composed by the legendary Marvin Hamlisch including the very popular Carly Simon and title song “Nobody Does It Better.” Hamlisch adds a unique disco infused touch to the Bond theme, but the jaunty music played during Bond’s escape in Egypt is a bit too much. I guess that is what we get for having an American take over for John Barry.

• When first I saw the Wetbike Bond rides I thought it was the coolest thing ever. When for the 38th time I saw the Wetbike that Bond rides I thought it was the coolest thing ever.

• My favorite meta moment comes when Jaws kills a shark by biting it to death.

• The Spy Who Loved Me features the most high stakes game of Operation in history.

• Sir Roger Moore is at the top of many people’s favorite Bond list, but as good as an actor as he was, he was an even better human being. The UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador will be forever missed.