Bullet Points: Penitentiary III
Having never seen the 1979 original and not being a huge fan of Penitentiary II (with the exception of the potato salad scene), I really did not have high hopes going into the third installment of the Penitentiary series, 1987’s Penitentiary III…
- Pugilistic Intro: The movie opens up with a professional boxing match being held in a hotel ballroom… the look of the fight felt like something I’d see on Sports Channel America while channel surfing back in the day… the fighters are El Cid and Martel “Too Sweet” Gordone (Leon Isaac Kennedy reprising his role from the first two films), but things take an unexpected turn when a shady character in the audience gives Too Sweet’s corner man the iggy and the corner man drops something into Too Sweet’s water bottle. At first I thought it was a mickey, so Too Sweet would take the fall… but it turned out to be a performance enhancer of some sort and Too Sweet ends up getting a lethal case of “roid rage” and just starts punching the shit out of El Cid… the match is thrown out, El Cid is rushed to the hospital where he ultimately dies and Martel “Too Sweet” Gordone finds himself returning to the slammer for manslaughter.
- Cannon Influence: The beloved or reviled (depending on your point of view) Cannon Films was the theatrical distributor of Penitentiary III, but I couldn’t help but see a Cannon influence on the cast once Too Sweet finds himself in prison and we meet some of the characters that he’ll be interacting with… like his cell mate Roscoe (Steve Antin, Cannon’s The Last American Virgin). And then there is the main prison guard, Joshua (Rick Zumwalt, Cannon’s Over the Top). Joshua, like most in the prison, cow tows to an eccentric prisoner named Serenghetti (Anthony Geary, Cannon’s Crack House), who all but runs the prison thanks in part to exploiting the warden’s gambling addiction.
- Welcome to the Serenghetti: Serenghetti is the guy who set up Too Sweet in the first place and the reason that Too Sweet finds himself behind bars yet again. Serenghetti wanted Too Sweet to be in his stable of fighters for an upcoming penal boxing tournament (featuring both a men’s and women’s bracket) that will have a lot of gambling action attached to it and will stand to make Serenghetti a lot of money. But Too Sweet refuses the invite, after killing his friend El Cid (and at this point not realizing why it happened) Too Sweet has sworn off fighting. This pisses off Serenghetti and he arranges for Too Sweet to have a prison cell encounter with the Midnight Thud.
- The Midnight Hour: They really build up the legend of the Midnight Thud… a prisoner who is more beast than man, that is confined to solitary confinement and only let out after midnight to kill, they also allude to the fact that one of Thud’s go to moves is to bite off his prey’s manhood. So one night out of the blue Joshua orders Roscoe to relocate leaving Too Sweet alone in his cell… alone until the Midnight Thud is let inside. What follows is one of the most bat shit crazy fights ever put on film with Too Sweet and the Thud. The Midnight Thud was instantly recognizable to me as legendary midget wrestler the Haiti Kid. But I never saw the Haiti Kid act like this before! Words really can’t do this scene justice, so click here if you want to check out the insanity.
- Solitaire: Too Sweet does the unimaginable and survives his encounter with the Midnight Thud… and soon the two become neighbors both having solitary confinement cells in the bowels of the prison. While all this is going on, Roscoe finds himself advancing to the finals of the ongoing boxing tournament, but his opponent is going to be the reigning king of the tournament and Serenghetti’s top fighter, See Veer (Danny Trejo). The Warden does not want See Veer (and Serenghetti) to win again… so he arranges for Too Sweet to train Roscoe for the big fight. Good times follow as we get a training montage and Roscoe even adopts the name “Sweet Nuff” in honor of his trainer. Things get even better for Too Sweet when he gets to have a conjugal visit with a female boxer… but this is where things turn bad again. While Too Sweet is getting some, Joshua locks the door and the match order is changed so Roscoe finds himself facing See Veer without Too Sweet in his corner. But as the fight begins, it seems Roscoe may not need Too Sweet as he holds his own and delivers some devastation to the reigning champ… that is until See Veer takes some of Serenghetti’s performance enhancer and Roscoe is toast!
- All the Marbles: Unlike Penitentiary II, Too Sweet has a chance to personally avenge his fallen friend, shut Serenghetti down and help the Warden regain control of his prison all in one fell swoop. But Too Sweet is not going to have to do it all alone as he gets help from a most unexpected source when The Midnight Thud becomes Too Sweet’s trainer as he prepares Too Sweet for the movie’s final fight against Serenghetti’s heavy named Hugo!
Penitentiary III was a big improvement over the second installment of the franchise from where I sit. Leon Isaac Kennedy’s Too Sweet got to be the classic action movie hero that he missed out on being in Penitentiary II… Anthony Geary proved once again how good he is at playing a scumbag…. Steve Antin’s Roscoe was a Grade A sidekick for Too Sweet… And Midnight Thud is a character that I don’t believe I will ever forget.
Watching Penitentiary III was such an enjoyable experience, I now feel it is my duty to go back and watch the original so I know how the Martel “Too Sweet” Gordon saga started.
And while I don’t yet know how Gordon’s story started, I do know how this review of Penitentiary III is going to end… with some Bonus Bullet Points!
- Fantasy Warfare: At one point during one of the boxing matches featuring the female competitors, the ladies get nose to nose and then go in for a kiss.
- Familiar Face: Hugo, Serenghetti’s muscle, was played by Magic Schwarz who action fans may recognize from Stone Cold and Lionheart. But the role I most associate with Magic Schwarz is that of Mad Dog Joe DeCurso from Grunt! The Wrestling Movie.
- Missed Opportunity: Spoiler alert… Roscoe is hospitalized after his fight with See Veer, but he survives and is expected to make a full recovery. I would have loved if there was a spin off film called Sweet Nuff, with Roscoe getting out of jail and going pro with Too Sweet as his trainer. It could have been Creed way before Creed was a thing.
