The Checklist: The Witcher (S1 Ep1) “The End’s Beginning”

You may be asking yourself, “Who or what is a Witcher?” At least I was as I fired up the Netflix machine and started my epic quest to discover what sorts of magic it took to keep Henry Cavill’s wig in place. But that wasn’t my only question as I sat down to watch The Witcher. I had at least five….

1- Are there all sorts of fantasy elements?

Well, this is a fantasy show based on a book series and video games so it goes without saying that there will be more but the show does start off with Geralt (Cavill) fighting some big swamp creature and slaying the shit out of it. Geralt himself is a Witcher, some sort of magical killing machine who has white hair and goes from town to town killing monsters of money. 1/1

2- There must be lots of time spent on world building?

The show doesn’t feel like it’s all exposition but it does introduce some main characters while also giving us a fair amount of action. We learn about several different cities and even see the invasion of a major one by a group who take no prisoners and only wear black like some medieval Sith. For an hour-long show, it didn’t overwhelm me with the differences it showed with the separate towns it visited but it was also taking its time to develop some attachment with Geralt. 1/1

3- Is there some good sword-swinging action?

There most certainly is! The series starts off by showing us Geralt’s skills with a sword as he kills some multi-legged creature in a forest. Then, throughout the hour, it shows us a massive battle, a city under siege, and a final throwdown featuring Geralt once again slicing his way through a group of dudes. If the show keeps this up then they may just grab me as a viewer. 1/1

4- But is the action any good?

The show definitely looks like there was some money poured into it. I would have preferred something that looked a little grittier and less polished but overall most of it looked fine. I hated the massive battle between the Queen of Cintra’s army and the black-clad people whose name I can’t remember. It was very dumb. Both armies just rode out into an open field and then charged one another. That complete lack of any tactical or strategic thought left me shaking my head to the point I may have strained my neck. .5/1

5- Will I keep watching?

I think the opening episode of The Witcher is good enough to give it another run. I enjoy this style of show and while I’m not familiar with this character or series in any other medium, it actually gives me more reason to enjoy it as I have no attachment to anything other than the show. Bring on the monster slaying! Give me Geralt swinging around his sword! Both the steel one at his side and the flesh-covered one he stabs the cute brunette with. I want some differentiation with the different cultures and I’d like to see some monster with massive exposed breasts. What can I say? I’m a man of simple tastes… 1/1

Final Score- 4.5/5: The Witcher was pretty cool. I don’t know if it will make fans of the books and video games go nuts but guys like me with zero attachment to any other part of the characters can still have fun with it. I still don’t really know what a Witcher is or why he just wanders around but I guess that will come with time. I’m not a big television show person so we’ll see if I ever finish this one but if I do, you’ll be one of the first to know it.