Bullet Points: Rise of the Dinosaurs

The release of Jurassic Park in the summer of 1993 and the billion dollars the movie grossed around the world, pretty much cemented that Hollywood would be going to the dinosaur well as often as possible for the rest of my lifetime.

For me personally, I never got caught up in the dinosaur movie craze… but I was more than a bit curious where 2013’s Rise of the Dinosaurs was concerned. The film was Executive Produced by Mark L. Lester of Commando fame and featured Commando baddie Vernon Wells in a supporting role… plus Bulletproof Action favorite, Michael Worth, was in the movie!

• The Mission: A commando unit led by Captain John Steakley (Gary Stretch) is sent into the jungles of Val Verde to rescue Dr. Angeles Ibanez (Natascha Berg), a chemical biologist who was kidnapped by a group of terrorists and is being forced to work on a hybrid chemical agent that can be dispersed by a missile launch. The terrorists are led by Gustavo Marquez (Israel Sáez de Miguel, Sharknado), a man who has had a previous run in with Steakley… adding a personal level to this mission for Steakley and his team. There’s also a self-preservation level added to the proceedings as Steakley is informed if his team fails, Val Verde will be bombed off the face of the Earth.
• The Pissing Contest: Steakley’s commanding officer is Colonel Carter (Corin Nemec, Drop Zone)… Carter proves to be exactly the kind of leader you’d want to report to if you were in the military, because he has his team’s back even with a bureaucrat like Agent Grimaldi (Vernon Wells, Nam Angels) looking to call in the airstrike at the first sign of trouble. Grimaldi and Carter go back and forth through out the movie… I thought Grimaldi was an absolute fool for engaging in a pissing contest with Carter, since everyone knows Parker Lewis can’t lose.

• Mission Accomplished?: So Steakley and his team manage to rescue Angeles and they even do one better and capture Marquez. But Marquez’ minions know their leader would rather be dead than be a prisoner of the establishment… so they attempt to shoot down the helicopter and they almost succeed. The rocket that was shot at the chopper, does not blow it up, but causes some major damage that sends the whirlybird out of control and forces it to crash into a mysterious crater not far from Marquez’ base of operations.
• The Lost World: Things are about to get very interesting for Steakley, his team, Marquez and Angeles as they find themselves in a place like they have never seen before… a crater that has been completely shut off from the rest of the world and one that has its own unique ecosystem… and also DINOSAURS! But prehistoric beasts aren’t the only ones calling the crater their home… the crater is also home to Professor Roxton (Michael Worth, Fists of Iron)… Roxton has been living in the crater for the past 5 years, ever since his plane crashed while trying to find the mysterious crater (we actually witness Roxton’s crater origin story in the opening scene of the film). Having no human contact for the past 5 years has made Roxton a little mad… making him more than a bit eccentric.

• The New Mission: The stakes for Steakley are higher than ever… now he has to try to get out of the crater without being killed by dinosaurs or his rival Marquez… plus there’s the wild card that is Professor Roxton, who being a man of science seemingly has more loyalty to the dinosaurs than his fellow man. Is Roxton trying to help Steakley and company? Or is Roxton trying to lead them all to their demise?

There is an audience out there for Rise of the Dinosaurs, but this movie is certainly not for everybody. If you enjoy the Sharknado movies chances are you’ll enjoy this one, if you don’t enjoy the Sharknado movies you’ll probably want to steer clear.

I would not categorize myself as a huge Sharknado fan, but I enjoyed seeing Michael Worth in a much different role than I’ve seen him play before. I was also a fan of Alicia Ziegler’s Sarah Haldeman character, the tough chick in Steakley’s commando unit. Corin Nemec and Vernon Wells were quality cast members but they were limited in how much they could add to the film given the placement of their characters in the plot.

The placement of Bonus Bullet Points is always at the end of a review…

• AKA: The original title of Rise of the Dinosaurs was Jurassic Attack.
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Michael Worth devoured by a CGI Tyrannosaurus rex, then Rise of the Dinosaurs is the movie for you.
• You Can’t Spell Cringe Without CGI: The computer generated dinosaurs produced more than a few cringe worthy moments in the film, although this was not completely unexpected given the fact that this was a modestly budgeted film. With that said, some of the CGI scenes were fun, even with the less than big budget special effects, like…
• If You Ever: …wanted to see a Tyrannosaurus rex’s head blown off by a rocket launcher, then Rise of the Dinosaurs is the movie for you.