Bullet Points: Return of Bruce

I have seen movies starring Bruce Lee. I have seen movies starring Bruce Li. I have seen movies starring Bruce Willis.

But after watching 1977’s Return of Bruce, I can say I have seen a movie SUPER STARRING Bruce Le… at least that’s what the opening credits had me believe…

• Fast Friends: Bruce Wong (Bruce Le, Bruce’s Deadly Fingers) travels to Manila to visit his uncle. But when Bruce goes to his uncle’s home, he finds out his uncle has moved away and apparently did not leave a forwarding address. So Bruce does what anyone would do in this situation, he starts wandering the streets of Manila aimlessly looking for his uncle. That’s when Bruce happens upon a young orphan named Piggy about to steal a wallet. Bruce has Piggy return the wallet to its rightful owner and to reward Piggy for doing the right thing, Bruce takes him out to eat.
• Damsel in Distress: As Bruce and Piggy are at the restaurant enjoying some chicken, a young lady being chased by three unsavory characters comes running up to Bruce asking for help. At first Bruce tries to brush the situation off, pointing out whatever is going on has nothing to do with him… but then one of the guys hits Bruce and pulls Bruce into the situation. Bruce kicks some ass in convincing fashion and we find out that the three guys who were chasing the young lady work for Mr. Cross, the biggest sex trafficker in Manila.
• Pleasure Before Business: We get a peek into Mr. Cross’ operation when a buyer, Mr. Chong, shows up with his bodyguards looking to make a deal for Mr. Cross’ stable of kidnapped women that Cross keeps locked up in his cellar. We also find out Mr. Cross has a “Pleasure Before Business” policy… so instead of cutting the deal with Chong right then and there, Cross has one scantily clad girl strip for them and then let’s Chong and his men “sample the goods”. Last but not least we establish that Cross has a girlfriend named Lisa (who *SPOILER ALERT* turns out to be an undercover cop). Cross also has an effeminate, clumsy stooge, who is pretty much physically and verbally abused by every other character in the movie at one point or another.

• Don’t Cross the Boss: When Cross doesn’t have his goon squad out looking for girls to abduct, he has them harassing a local man who runs a martial arts school and has interfered in Cross’ business in the past with the help of his students. The man is the brother of the young lady that ran up to our hero Bruce in the restaurant… which establishes that the goons were after her for a reason and she was not a random target. This brother and sister combo who are on Cross’ radar also turn out to be cousins of Bruce Wong!? It really is a small world after all! Anyway… Bruce offers to help his cousins in their war with Cross’ gang… but things take a dramatic turn when a fight at the graveyard ends up with Bruce killing one of Cross’ henchmen.
• Isn’t It Ironic?: Cross, the dirty sex trafficker, is now threatening to go to the police concerning the murder or one of his employees unless Bruce’s cousin shuts down his martial arts school. Bad ass Bruce feeling guilty and not wanting his cousin to shut his school down, decides he is going to go to Cross’ compound and set things straight. Bruce fights his way into seeing Mr. Cross and when he gets into Cross’ office he tells Cross the way things are going to be OR ELSE. I should probably mention in all the chaos Bruce caused at the compound, Lisa the undercover cop freed all of Cross’ prisoners. Bruce then decides he better get the hell out of town, but first he must write a letter to his cousins.

• Revenge of Bruce: Mr. Cross is not a happy man, he was humiliated in his office and he no longer has his women to sell, so Cross hires Sakata, an assassin from Japan, to go kill Bruce’s cousin at the martial arts school. When Bruce shows up to deliver his letter, he sees his cousin dying on the floor and now Bruce is pissed. I would like to point out that this happens around the movie’s 60 minute mark…. the movie has a total run time of 96 minutes. Which means the final third of the film is just Bruce Le fighting bad guys. Guys that you’d expect like Mr. Cross, Mr. Chong and Sakata… but also unexpected surprises like Sakta’s brother (Lo Lieh, The Lady Hermit). I was shocked Bolo Yeung didn’t show up to get his ass kicked by Bruce too.

Return of Bruce ends in ambiguous fashion like it was a chopsocky Sopranos… we see Piggy by the pier waiting for his friend Bruce, in the distance we hear cop cars. then as a crying Piggy has seemingly given up on his friend and starts walking away from the pier, we see the cop cars whizzing by and the movie just stops… at least the version I saw… Were the cop cars going to the Cross Compound? Was Bruce arrested for murdering basically all the bad guys? Did Piggy ever find out what happened to his friend Bruce?

I imagine these are all questions left for the viewer to answer on their own. But when it comes to the question, “Does this review contain any Bonus Bullet Points? …I have the answer and the answer is YES…

• Way of the Dragon: Bruce Le borrows a move from Bruce Lee’s battle with Chuck Norris in Way of the Dragon when he gets two handfuls of chest hair in his fight with Mr. Chong’s bodyguards.
• Memorable Quote #1: “She’s much better naked.” – Mr. Cross
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Bruce Le in a parade, then Return of Bruce is the movie for you.
• Memorable Quote #2: “You don’t smell good, get away from me.” – Mr. Cross
• Name That Tune: Like many films in the Bruceploitation genre, Return of Bruce features Herbie Hancock’s music from Death Wish and Lalo Schifrin’s music from Enter the Dragon. But Return of Bruce had one surprise soundtrack entry in the form of “The Entertainer” by Percy Faith and His Orchestra. I’m not 100% sure but I think an instrumental version of Barry Manilow’s “Mandy” was also featured.