Bullet Points: Action U.S.A.
1989’s Action U.S.A. has always been something of a social media darling. For years I have seen people talk glowingly about the movie on various social media platforms. Some even shared clips as proof that the movie did exist. But every time I would search for the film on Amazon or eBay, I would come up short. The streaming services were of no help either, that is until now…
Thanks to Verdugo Entertainment and Alamo On Demand, I was finally able to see this rare gem in the world of action entertainment in all its restored glory…
- Coitus Interruptus: The movie starts off with Billy Ray (Rod Shaft) and his girl Carmen (Barri Murphy) cruising in Billy Ray’s customized 1969 Corvette Stingray. When Billy Ray and Carmen arrive at Carmen’s place, the two start to get hot and heavy on Carmen’s couch and that’s about the time two goons who work for mobster Frankie Navarro (Cameron Mitchell, Terror in Beverly Hills) bust down the front door and drag Billy Ray outside… they are looking for some diamonds that Billy Ray stole from Frankie. But Billy Ray does not cooperate, so the goons try to force Billy Ray to talk by hanging him upside down from a helicopter in flight. This leads to our first big stunt fall with Billy Ray taking the plunge from the helicopter down into the water below… fortunately for Billy Ray, Carmen was trailing the helicopter the entire time and was there to pick up Billy Ray. Unfortunately for Billy Ray and Carmen, Frankie Navarro’s goons weren’t going to give up so easily. This leads to our first big car chase, that ends with our goons catching up with Billy Ray and Carmen and after all the trouble they went to get Billy Ray to talk… the goons shoot Billy Ray dead. Carmen sees the whole thing before she takes off into the woods, where she is tackled by FBI Agent Osborn (Gregory Scott Cummins, Dead End City).
- Witness Protection: Osborn and his partner McKinnon aka Panama (William Hubbard Knight) have been assigned to protect Carmen, who is now a witness to a murder… a murder ordered by Frankie Navarro. Osborn and Panama also manage to pick Carmen’s brain and something she remembered Billy Ray told her about a ranch and a windmill, ends up with our FBI heroes finding the diamonds Billy Ray stole from Frankie Navarro before the bad guys. Speaking of Navarro, Frankie doesn’t trust his regular goons to get the job done, so he calls in a heavy hitter named Drago (Ross Hagen, Blood Games). Drago shows up at the airport in a mini-plane, dressed like a Walker, Texas Ranger cosplayer and immediately establishes himself as the alpha male, putting Frankie’s guys Lucky and Hitch (Hoke Howell, Avenging Angel) in their place.
- Hot Potato: With our good guys and bad guys all in play, Action U.S.A. enters what I like to call the hot potato portion of the film, with the hot potato in this scenario being Carmen. Osborn and Panama lose and rescue Carmen over and over again but things take a turn when the trio end up at a Waco institution, The Melody Ranch! It is here we find out that an FBI badge is no substitute for the Melody Ranch’s $3 cover charge and that Carmen is quite the singer… we also get the obligatory bar fight because there is no way a movie called Action U.S.A. is not going to follow one of the most important rules in action movies. As the movie winds down, the forces of evil start to get thinned out and in spectacular fashion with Lucky being defenestrated out of a high rise and Hitch going out in a blaze of glory in another epic car chase. But unfortunately for our heroes, there are some unexpected villains to contend with before the movie ends…
Famed attorney Lionel Hutz may have had a case where 1984’s The NeverEnding Story was concerned, but nobody is going to be able to sue the makers of Action U.S.A. for false advertising. Action U.S.A. delivers the action early and delivers the action often… which is probably for the best because there’s not much plot to this movie. But who the hell needs a deep multi-layered plot when you have car chases, a bar fight, men on fire, shootouts, big falls and spectacular car jumps!
Who the hell needs some Action U.S.A. Bonus Bullet Points? The answer is every action movie lover on the planet…
- Familiar Face: William Smith of Eye of the Tiger and Red Dawn fame plays Osborn and McKinnon’s boss, Conover.
- If You Ever: …wanted to see a car forced off the road and into a house during a high speed car chase, followed by the driver of the car apologizing to the homeowner for destroying his house, followed by the damaged house blowing up, then Action U.S.A. is the movie for you.
- Out of Context Quote: “Change that fucking rubber!” – Drago
- AKA: The working title for the film was Handful of Trouble.
- If You Ever: …wanted to see a message delivered via jock strap, then Action U.S.A. is the movie for you.
