Bullet Points: Desert Heat (1999)

If I had to describe 1999’s Desert Heat in one word it would be “quirky”.

The plot, inspired by Akira Kurosawa’s Yojimbo, allowed Jean-Claude Van Damme to do a lot of the things you’d expect from JCVD. But it also dropped him in a world filled with an eclectic cast of characters and dark comedy.

• The Hogan Family: Troubled veteran Eddie Lomax (Jean-Claude Van Damme) is traveling through the desert on his way to visit his friend Johnny. Before he reaches his destination, Eddie’s motorcycle breaks down and Eddie follows suit. Eddie takes a swig of booze and grabs his gun, it looks like Eddie is about to end it all… but instead of shooting himself he begins to shoot wildly. That’s when one of Eddie’s bullets hits a pickup truck passing through… the truck belongs to a nefarious trio, the Hogan brothers (Matt, Jesse and Petey). The Hogan boys are not happy with Eddie, who at this point is drunk out of his mind and seeing visions of his friend Johnny. So, they shoot Eddie with his own gun and take Eddie’s gun and motorcycle. Then Matt and Jesse instruct their young brother Petey (Jonathan Avildsen aka Snake from The Karate Kid Part III) to finish the job on Eddie. Fortunately for Eddie, Petey chickens out… something Matt and Jesse don’t realize as they drive away.
• Johnny On The Spot: Eddie Lomax’s good fortune continued when his friend, Johnny Sixtoes (Danny Trejo, Machete), finds Eddie near death and takes him back to his home where Johnny uses Native American medicine to nurse his old friend back to health. After Eddie recuperates he is looking for revenge. Johnny gives Eddie the 411 on the Hogan boys and their father, who are in the drug running business with the local motorcycle gang The Heathens. Johnny suggests a divide and conquer strategy, points Eddie in the right direction and recommends that Eddie stop at the diner run by his friend Rhonda and sample her famous apple pie.

• New in Town: As Eddie is making his way into town, he can’t help but notice the Hogan boys leaving the general store, so before he goes to the diner Eddie pops into the store to inquire about the guys that just left. Here Eddie meets two more miscreants, Lester and Leon (Gregory Scott Cummins, Action U.S.A.). Lester and Leon, who are running the store for their uncle Eli, aren’t going to win any customer service awards, in fact Lester pulls a gun on Eddie. But that backfires severely and Lester ends up shooting Leon and then Eddie throws Leon’s knife into Lester’s chest…. that’s about the time Eddie meets Eli (Bill Erwin). Leon and Lester had Eli chained to a recliner in the back room and after freeing him, the old timer becomes Eddie’s first ally in town,
• What Kind of Pie Was That?: Eddie really worked up an appetite killing two guys and freeing Eli, so he makes his way over to the diner to have some of that famous apple pie and that’s when he meets Rhonda (Gabrielle Fitzpatrick). The sparks are flying instantly and it is pretty apparent where these two are going to end up by the end of the film. At the diner, Eddie also meets handyman Jubal Early (Pat Morita, Bloodsport 2), who helps Eddie dispose of the bodies of Lester and Leon.

• Divide and Conquer: Johnny’s advice about the apple pie panned out, so now Eddie decides to try Johnny’s divide and conquer strategy. Eddie finds out about a bar that The Heathens hang out at and he shows up, interjects on the behalf of two women that The Heathens were harassing, then Eddie ends up killing three of the bikers and blowing up some of their motorcycles… before he leaves, Eddie is sure to tell the rest of The Heathens that he is working for the Hogan family. The Heathens take the bait as expected and it isn’t long before they ambush and nearly kill Ramsey Hogan (Larry Drake, Darkman) and his three sons.
• The Party is Over: The divide and conquer strategy only worked temporarily and Ramsey Hogan and the head of The Heathens, Ives (Paul Koslo, Mr. Majestyk) figure out that Eddie Lomax is playing them. (and Matt and Jesse Hogan figure out that their younger brother Petey did not kill Eddie Lomax like he claimed.) With the villains (mostly) united, Eddie and his new found friends are going to have to work together if they want to eliminate the bad apples from this little desert town.

Desert Heat, despite not being your prototypical Jean-Claude Van Damme vehicle, is still oddly satisfying and it is one of the more unique entries in Jean-Claude Van Damme’s filmography. If you’ve never seen it, I’d suggest you give it a watch, especially if you are a JCVD completist.

Now allow me to complete this review with some Bonus Bullet Points…

• AKA: Desert Heat had the working title of Coyote Moon. At some point the title was changed to Inferno, but eventually it became known as Desert Heat when it was released in the United States. However, it was released under the Inferno title just about everywhere else in the world.
• Favorite Quote: “I bet he gets lots of pussy.” – Jubal Early
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Jean-Claude Van Damme wearing nothing but a pair of cowboy boots, then Desert Heat is the movie for you. Maybe they should have stuck with the Coyote Moon title.
• Familiar Faces: Priscilla Pointer plays Mrs. Howard, the owner of the local motel. I’ll always associate Pointer from her role in A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors… Jeff Kober (Automatic, The Big Fall) plays Beserko, a member of The Heathens… And last but not least, Jaime Pressly (The Journey: Absolution) plays Dottie Matthews a waitress at Rhonda’s diner.
• Directed By: John G. Avildsen, most known for directing Rocky and The Karate Kid, directed Desert Heat under the pseudonym Danny Mulroon. Desert Heat would end up being Avildsen’s final feature film.