Scene of the Week: Stargrove
Never Too Young To Die is an action film that has a lot going for it. Is there anyone who doesn’t like John Stamos? John Stamos as Lance Stargrove is perfect and it is unfortunate his television career probably stopped him from continuing in the action movie world. I can never not like a movie that has a James Bond actor playing a spy, this time with George Lazenby as the elder Stargrove. Gene Simmons is a unique villain and there is probably no better spy to be teamed up with then Vanity’s Danja Deering. With all that star power and action, I can’t forget about the top notch music in Never Too Young To Die.
This week’s Scene of the Week takes a look at the opening of Never Too Young to Die with Lance Stargrove bouncing and flipping all over the place with the infectious “Stargrove” sung by Tommie Lee Bradley playing. While some may find the title song “Never Too Young To Die” worth singing to, for me it is always “Stargrove” that gets me going just like it does for the movie.
Highlights of that scene:
00:05–00:25 : Pour one out for some absolutely *abysmal* ADR, here. The coach’s endless barrage of cliche (and completely meaningless) commentary may strain credulity on its own merits, but not nearly as much as the fantasy that those words are emanating from anywhere in the remote vicinity of actor Jon Greene’s mouth.
00:00–01:06 : Speaking of, did Greene and Tommie Lee Bradley have some sort of side-competition going, to see who could force more repetitions of the word “Stargrove” into the first minute of the film? Bradley wins that contest, no question, but Greene still gets an A for effort.
01:26 — The sound engineer takes pity on the audience, and decides to SPARE us any further awful ADR commentary from Coach Discount Don Stark. There is much rejoicing.
01:31–01:36 : Is it just me, or is there a good chance that Misshapen Steve Guttenberg and Teenage Michael Chiklis With Hair mess with Stargrove (Staaaar-grove, Star. Grove. STAAAR-Growwve!) primarily as a coping mechanism, to prevent their simmering sexual tension from boiling over into full-on mutual groping? (It could just be me.)
02:07–02:18 : #NOTSUREIF heavy Porky’s vibe, or… oh, nope, we veered into Revenge of the Nerds. Well, as long as we’ve got our tropes all lined up in a row.
02:45 : Oh, I bet there’s PLENTY you two can teach him.
…Also, not really relevant to this particular scene, but you didn’t mention Robert Englund is also in the movie! Neat.