Bullet Points: Top Dog
The buddy cop movie is one of the go to movie genres for action filmmakers. With so many buddy cop films, the movie needs to be excellent or have something unique for it to standout. How about teaming up a drunkard Chuck Norris with a canine? I would say that 1995’s Top Dog qualifies as both unique and excellent. I happen to have some Top Dog Bullet Points to help you decide if Top Dog is a good boy or should be left at the pound.
- Hound Dog – White supremacy hate speech is not the opening I was expecting to Top Dog followed by a massive explosion, but it definitely lets the audience know that Top Dog is a legit action movie from the start. Of course the next scene introduces us to Reno the dog eating a jelly donut (a Winchell’s donut, no less) from his partner Lou Swanson. I guess even cop dogs can’t shake the donut eating stereotype.
- I Wanna Be Your Dog – Reno and Lou are at the scene of the explosion from the opening and Reno not only manages to rescue a baby from the inferno, he also manages to make all the firefighters look like chumps. Lou manages to suss out the guilty party and follows them back to their boat. Not a smart move for Lou because the guilty party happens to be part of a white supremacy group that is loaded for bear with a huge cache of C-4 and automatic weapons and they bad guys don’t like to be discovered. Lou and Reno are both shot, but Reno manages to survive. I wonder who Reno’s next partner will be?
- Hair of the Dog – Top Dog has Chuck Norris playing Det. Jake Wilder, and it is a role that you have probably not seen before. Wilder is a slovenly police officer on suspension and his place is littered with empty beer cans and in general disarray. It is not that Jake is a bad cop, he is actually very good at getting the bad guys, but he has been suspended multiple times for insubordination. Jake is taken off suspension to be partnered up with Reno to catch Lou’s killer. While Jake is not happy, I couldn’t be happier. You haven’t lived until you have heard Chuck Norris fling insults at a dog. “You don’t even look like a police dog.” “You reject from the dog pound.” “Grrr yourself, you mutt.”
- Black Dog – There is a surprising amount of action as Reno and Jake unravel the mystery but also become close partners. They are helped out by a big bust from the Border Patrol that not only gives them a lead, but also allows the audience to witness a fantastic chase. But all the action is just good, once it gets compared to my new favorite scene. A hit squad dressed as clowns comes to kill Reno and Jake, and if the clown get ups are not enough, the circus-esque music playing while Jake’s home is getting shot to pieces will surely convince you of the scene’s greatness. You know Chuck Norris is not going out to some fools dressed as clowns. Dig this pithy quote when he takes them out, with Reno’s help, natch, “You are under arrest, bozo.” Savage!
- Atomic Dog – Top Dog is a short movie filled with action, but there is still some unnecessary filler. Scenes with Jake and his mother are not needed, although Jake’s mother does have some valuable help for her son because she knew Hitler’s birthday at the drop of a hat. Lou’s grandson Matthew shows up every once in a while because I suppose to appeal to the younger audience (as if the murderous white supremacy isn’t enough for them.) Matthew takes Reno to a dog show which just adds minutes to the run time, but I did like the Reno trying on people clothes montage. And did I just see Reno drive away in a convertible? There is also a female detective who really likes Reno and maybe a love interest for Jake, but I am not really sure because there is no time for it in Top Dog.
- Diamond Dogs – There are two reasons to check out Top Dog. Chuck Norris acting with a dog, and Chuck Norris fighting and Top Dog does not disappoint. For those of you who want to see a Chuck Norris versus 25 goon fight in a factory, a fight that is worth the price of admission, then you are in luck, but not even Chuck Norris can’t stop monkey wrench. Reno to the rescue! For those of you who want to see a Chuck Norris attempting to care of a dog, only for the dog to outsmart him at every turn, like Reno skipping his dog food to eat Chuck’s piping hot chicken dinner, then you are in luck.
Top Dog is not your typical Chuck Norris action movie, but that is definitely a good thing. You will see Chuck Norris in a role that is very unique, but still with all the requisite roundhouses and badassery. The action is surprisingly good and consistent, both human and canine. The villains are forgettable, but it is still satisfying to see the hate mongers get what they deserve in the end. And I don’t know if it is always intentional or not, but Chuck Norris is funny and I like it. For me, Top Dog is a fun ride that is worth taking home with you if you see it sitting somewhere looking back at you with those puppy dog eyes. I will throw you a bone and end these Top Dog Bullet Points with some Top Dog Bonus Bullet Points….
- Berger de Brie – Reno is a Briard played by Betty, whom you may remember as Ruff in 1993’s Dennis the Menace.
- Best Joke – When Reno sees Jake’s filthy home for the first time he immediately runs outside to sleep in the car. Take that you pig, Jake Wilder. Too dirty even for a damn dog!
- Familiar Faces – Jake’s superior Ken Callahan was played by Clyde Kusatsu whom I always remember from Midway and American Pie. Timothy Bottoms plays Nelson Houseman and while Bottoms has been in lots of films, I will never forget Mortal Challenge.
- Best Running Gag – Everyone telling Jake that Reno is a hero never gets old.
- Bad Boys – Reno watching the TV show Cops may get a head shake from Jake, but it gets a smile from me.
