Bullet Points: Mr. Hercules Against Karate
I became aware of 1973’s Mr. Hercules Against Karate a few years back when I noticed it on the Charge! schedule. Best I could tell it aired one time on the over the air network at 2am on Saturday and then was never to be seen on Charge! again.
Fast forward to 2022 and I am scrolling through Screen Pix and there it was Mr. Hercules Against Karate… a movie I wasn’t sure I would ever come across again. But now after years of waiting I could finally watch…
- When One Door Closes: The movie starts off with two “Americans” Percy (Fernando Bilbao aka Fred Harris, The Exterminators of the Year 3000) and Danny (Alberto Terracina aka Tom Scott) working a construction job in Sydney, Australia… it is here we witness the Herculean strength of Percy for the first time and how a simple man like Percy not knowing his own strength can cause chaos. The chaos they cause leads Percy and Danny right to the unemployment line.
- Everybody Have Fun Tonight, Everybody Wang Pub Tonight: After they get their walking papers, Percy and Danny end up at The Wang Pub, where they order a couple of beers and Percy makes them a giant bologna sandwich to share…but before they could finish their bologna blowout, the local football team shows up and they are looking for a fight. Can two men take on an entire football team? If one of them is Percy they sure can! The Wang Pub is destroyed during the melee and not surprisingly the disturbance attracts the cops. But when the cops do show up, the proprietor of The Wang Pub tells the cops that Percy and Danny were simply doing demolition work for an upcoming remodel… but Mr. Wang had an ulterior motive for keeping Percy and Danny out of jail.
- Rescue Mission: Wang was impressed by the way Percy and Danny handled themselves in the bar fight and now wants to hire them to travel to Hong Kong to bring back his young son Henshu… who was taken by his ex-wife Harlot when she ran off with Kung Fu master Hung Lo… Harlot isn’t even Henshu’s birth mother so it is odd that there isn’t some sort of legal means that Wang could get his son back, but then he couldn’t offer Percy and Danny $100,000 to do the job and there’d be no movie.
- Destination Hong Kong: Percy and Danny arrive in Hong Kong and instead of them finding Hung Lo, Hung Lo’s minions find them after they check into their hotel… and instead of going up to their room on the third floor, they are escorted to the basement where they battle in the boiler room which results in the hotel going through wild temperature swings and Hung Lo’s minions getting their asses handed to them…. later that evening Danny and Percy go out on a double date with Ai-Lan, the stewardess Danny was hitting on on the plane ride over, and Ai-Lan’s friend Lee-Ping. But on their way back to the hotel, Danny and Percy are attacked by a “dragon” on the street.
- Wake Up Call: After the second attack, Danny decides they better do what they are being paid for and do some recon of Hung Lo’s estate where they once again find themselves battling Hung Lo’s minions and once again they find themselves on the winning end. But they did not rescue Henshu and they have really managed to piss off Hung Lo now…. so it is no surprise when Hung Lo dispatches his minions once more, although this time they actually manage to accomplish something and kidnap Percy and Danny and their lady loves. It is also no surprise that Percy and Danny turn things around and once again come out on top, rescue Henshu and even help the police in preventing Hung Lo from escaping Hong Kong.
Mr. Hercules Against Karate does not feature anyone named Mr. Hercules and the villainous Hung Lo is a Kung Fu master not a Karate master, so the title isn’t exactly accurate. But Mr. Hercules Against Karate does feature plenty of slapstick comedy, some rear projection and miniature special effects that remind you this movie was made in the early 70s and when it was over I realized why Charge! only aired it once. There are some entertaining moments but not enough to qualify Mr. Hercules Against Karate as a good movie.
Do these Bonus Bullet Points qualify as Good Bonus Bullet Points?
- If You Ever: …wanted to see a man use drumsticks as chopsticks, then Mr. Hercules Against Karate is the movie for you.
- Favorite Quote: “Who wants a girl with a greasy mustache?” – Percy
- If You Ever: …wanted to see a samurai rip out the eye balls of some martial arts students, then Mr. Hercules Against Karate is the movie for you.
