Bullet Points: The Northman
There are some movies that seem tailormade for us and it’s important to understand that. Why shouldn’t I know who I am and what I like? It just so happens that historical bloodshed is something that appeals to me in a big way and when you make the story some sort of Shakespearian tragedy with battles then I am even more excited. I thought The Northman looked just like “my shit” when I saw the trailer and now I’m quite certain that it is, in fact, my shit.
Synopsis: A young Viking prince is on a quest to avenge his father’s murder.
- Return of the King: The returning victor King Aurvandil rides into his village as his young son and wife react with glee. He has been away warring and raiding and doing whatever Viking kings did back then and now he’s back to reap the rewards of all of his deeds. Unfortunately for him, he’s taken a mighty wound and most of this first section of the film is spent trying to position his son to take his place.
- Stop stabbing me bro: Despite the love they share for one another, sometimes brothers fight. King Aurvandil and his brother Fjölnir don’t just fight, though, they kill. Fjölnir and his minions take the King’s life and do their best to kill his young son. The boy Amleth escape and vows his revenge. Here….we….go….
- Preparing for Revenge: We see that the young Amleth is vowing to avenge his father, save his mother, and kill his uncle. In these next scenes, we get to see what Amleth has become in the process of his preparation. A fantastic battle sequence where Amleth is among the berserkers attacking a village sees him cleaving heads in, catching spears in mid-air, and also screaming and howling like a damned animal. It’s a great way to show the beast he has become.
- How bad do you want it: You never have to question how bad Amleth wants his revenge because he’s willing to make himself a slave in a far away land just for the opportunity to kill a mother fucker.
- Ladies: During his travels into Iceland Amleth meets Anya Taylor-Joy’s Olga. She is a witch (I guess) taken from the Rus where Amleth’s crew was raiding. He hides out on the ship which is taking the slaves to his old enemy’s new crib in Iceland. Olga is clearly a character that is going to have a big role in the film but we don’t know just how important she is at this point. She basically becomes his main squeeze and his equal when it comes to revenging super hard. She holds a mighty grudge. We also are re-acquainted with Kidman’s Queen Gudrun. She has transitioned well from the wife of Aurvandil to this new union with Fjölnir. They even have a son of their own. It’s clear that she pulls far more strings than she probably did with her late husband.
- Start the revenging: As Amleth starts getting more and more comfortable in his role as a slave, an opportunity presents itself that turns him into a more trusted slave. He’s granted certain privileges that the others aren’t an soon he’s bumping uglies with Olga and making plans that will soon be bringing the entire tribe down. We also start getting our first tastes of revenge as Amleth kills some guards in the middle of the night and positions their bodies in way that Art the Clown would enjoy. The shit is ready to hit the fan.
- Duo: As I said, they are very a much a duo who is hell-bent on getting revenge and Olga is as much a part of it as Amleth. They seem to truly be in love but nothing can move forward until Amleth has quenched this thirst for blood that he has. He follows his fate throughout the film and each time that it seems he’s diverting from it or slowly straying from the path he stops himself.
- Feed the blade: Before Amleth can even start taking down Fjölnir and his men he needs to get the perfect weapon. Everything he does is driven by his belief in his fate and even after he acquires the sword via ass-whooping, he must continue to hide his intentions until the time is right. Late in the nights, though, he feeds his blade the blood of the guards and continues to torment Fjölnir and his family.
- Fate: We can’t change what we are and Amleth finally meets the end that he was fated to meet. Fjölnir and his Queen tell a story and Olga gets her last chance to change the mind of Amleth but his quest is for blood and there isn’t much that will stop him. Including getting stabbed a whole bunch. Dude loses a lot of blood before the finale where resembles Viking Obi-wan vs Viking Anakin far more than it should have, It’s a fitting ending to a film that only could have ended this way.
The Verdict: The Northman was pretty kick-ass and I’m sorry I waited so long to see it. The artsy-ness turned me off of it, to be honest, but it wasn’t something that was distracting while watching. Even some of my friends (who generally don’t have great taste in movies) labeled the film as weird, but I half expected it and then started to enjoy the points in the film that make it unique. It’s a little surprising that Alexander Skarsgård hasn’t found that role yet to make him a massive star. I feel like he’s had a few opportunities at this point and maybe he should try his luck with some sort of HBO series. No matter, The Northman wasn’t the most original or surprising of films but it was beautiful to look at and essentially Viking Shakespeare. Big thumbs up from me.
