Bullet Points: Hunt Club
I like action movies so I obviously am a fan of Casper Van Dien and despite the nightmarish look of Mickey Rourke’s face, he can still add value with his undeniable charisma to a smaller budgeted film. Add in a veteran actor like Mena Suvari and it’s clear to see that Hunt Club has a real opportunity for the folks at Uncork’d media.
Synopsis: Follows a group of male hunters who regularly lure women to their island with the chance to win 100K in a hunt, only to discover that they are the hunted, but this time they mess with the wrong girls and must deal with the consequences.
- To the rescue: There is no doubt that crime is rampant throughout the country and you have to always be on your guard. Women especially have to keep their head on a swivel and Mena Suvari’s Cassandra learns first hand that most men cannot be trusted. She gets attacked by a trio of dudes and we’re introduced first to her rescuer and resident badass Tessa (Maya Stojan). She lays waste to the men and does her best “come with me if you want to live”.
- Father and son bonding: Small town diners are great for a number of reasons. Large servings of delicious food and some of the best pies you’ll ever have. Apparently it’s also a great place to meet desperate women who you can then hunt on a secluded island. Carter (Van Dien) and his son Jackson (Will Pelz) are having lunch when they meet Suvari’s Cassandra. They sense she’s going through some stuff and Carter is desperate to “man up” his 18 year old son so they invite her on their hunting trip and she agrees. What a terrible decision!
- Alpha males: While the misogynistic losers who show up to the island have dreams of murdering women and taking back some sort of naturalistic manliness, they mostly just annoyed me into wishing this movie had some better dialogue. Some of the very few scenes we get of the men talking about WHY they chose to hunt people is so flimsy that it’s transparent. The age-old most dangerous game elites-hunt-poors formula is instead replaced by some super lame attempt to show a bunch of unwanted losers trying to “become men” by killing young underwear-clad women. It’s like some boomers decided this would be a good way to get stupid Gen Z’ers to blow their money in an attempt to not be sissy virgins anymore only these characters still don’t manage to be interesting.
- Hunt, hunt, hunt: When the men finally do decide to release some of the women for their big hunt, it’s about as lame as any film hunt I can think of. There is nothing less manly or alpha than chasing a shackled woman while riding a side by side and wearing some shitty camo clothes you found at Walmart.
- Fighting back: By the time that Cassandra is released into the sparsely populated forest, Tessa has made her way to the island and already begun her reign over the pussies hunting women. The fact that she doesn’t even break a sweat tells you all you need to know about the quality of the Hunt Club participants and it’s becoming increasingly apparent that this movie wasn’t cast very well. No matter, Tessa whoops some asses and eventually finds Cassandra just as Jackson is forced into his own terrible decision. Trust me, it’s not that interesting….
- Tipping the scales: All of the rapers and assholes get what is coming to them including a pair of brothers played by Jason and Jeremy London. They were easily my favorite performances in the film even though they were probably the worst characters. They certainly earn what comes to them as Tessa and Cassandra run roughshod all over this island of whiney bitches. On to the next ones, I guess.
The Verdict: This is not a good movie. I wish I could say that it was given the fact that it does feature a few decent performances but the unoriginality of the picture and the one-note characters on the island just made me wish it was all over sooner. CVD and Mickey Rourke, along with the London brothers, do their best to add to the film all while the story and dialogue drag the movie into the muck. Mena Suvari is the standout in the film (if there is one) but even she can’t salvage the arc given to her and her character bounces around from victim to vigilante to something else all together. The movie doesn’t benefit from the fact that this story has been done better dozens of times over the years but I truly feel that a few small changes could have drastically improved this film. Still, fans of CVD might give it a try for something a little different and any girlpower Mena Suvari supporters might want to watch this cause one guy gets his dick sliced off. Cinema isn’t dead.
ON DIGITAL, ON DEMAND AND DVD APRIL 4
