Bullet Points: Ninja the Final Duel
I first watched 1986’s Ninja the Final Duel earlier this year while celebrating Ninja November. I knew almost immediately it was a movie that I wanted to cover for the site. After I finished the film, I was not entirely sure what I watched. I even questioned if I had watched a movie or if I fell asleep on my couch and had some bizarre fever dream.
If I was going to review Ninja the Final Duel, I was going to need to rewatch it and have my trusty notebook at my side…
- Expansion Plans: The movie begins with a Japanese ninja clan looking to expand their operations into China. But these ambitious ninjas weren’t counting on China’s top fighters, the Shaolin monks, kicking their asses. The loss is so shameful for the ninja leader that he offs himself… which does not sit well with his brother, Shan Ran. Shan Ran (who believes pants are optional) vows revenge on the Shaolin monks… but he realizes his ninjas are going to need to do some intense training first… this is where we are introduced to various ninja fighting elements (or elemets if you will), like the Iron Tiger Claws and my personal favorite, the Water Spider Assault Unit, which is introduced in grand fashion when the familiar sounds of “Bloodsucker” by Mandingo can be heard (or as I refer to it, the theme from Sleeping Fist).
- Funky Like a Monk: Elsewhere in Japan, Wang Chi-Chung (Alexander Lo Rei, The Super Ninja) wants to leave his monastery and travel to China and the Shaolin Temple for much less nefarious reasons than Shan Ran and his ninja clan. Wang Chi-Chung wants to train and learn from the Shaolin monks. But Wang’s master is not so sure Wang Chi-Chung is up for such a quest. Wang Chi-Chung disagrees and that leads to Wang going through a series of challenges… if he passes the test the master will allow Wang to travel to China, if not he’ll die, so he won’t be able to travel to Japan. This sequence goes on for what felt like an eternity (maybe it was that incessant drumming)… in the end Wang survives the “Swastika Trap” and is off to China and his master decrees that Wang’s buddy, Chung Tin can go with.
- Wally World: Wang Chi-Chung and Chung Tin make it to the Shaolin Temple only to find out that it is CLOSED. After defeating the ninja clan, the peace loving Abbot decided that it was time to shut their doors to the outside world for a while. It turns out that Wang and Chung Tin weren’t the only ones shut out of visiting the Temple… a pair of Hare Krishnas from California were also disappointed to learn that they would not be able to train with the Shaolin Monks. Wang and Chung Tin respect the Abbot’s ruling and presumably are heading back to Japan, the Hare Krishnas follow them and this leads to a tag team battle and it is battle that is interrupted by a damsel in distress, Peng Yi. Peng Yi is badly injure and Wang Chi-Chung takes it upon himself to take her to safety and nurse her back to health…
- Off the Rails: This is where the movie REALLY starts going off the rails… the Hare Krishnas double back and manage to break into the Shaolin Temple, which causes some concern among the monks… if the fucking tambourine playing Hare Krishnas could break in certainly the evil ninjas could. Speaking of the evil ninjas, they end up “hypnotizing” Chung Tin and force him to join their ranks… we cut to Wang Chi-Chung, who is putting a very naked Peng Yi into a hot tub to help her recover. He then goes to the waterfall to take a bath himself while he waits… That’s when the ninjas show up and the very naked Peng Yi shoots out of the tub and begins to battle the ninjas. She eventually manages to fashion herself some bra and panties out of a sheet and it is shortly after that she calls out for Wang’s help. So he hops out of his bath and races back to her, at this point I wished the “Thong Song” had already been recorded so it could have been stolen and used for the fight scene. The ninjas eventually retreat as they have bigger fish to fry…
- Ninja Attack: The next day some of Shan Ran’s ninjas go to the Shaolin Temple and kill the monks that were guarding the entrance. When the Abbot learns of the attack, he believes that Wang Chi-Chung is involved, since he is Japanese. Wang is offended by the accusation but hears them out and agrees to allow them to do a full investigation and accepts their invitation to stay at the Temple while they do some background checks on their non-existent computers, I guess… In addition to the investigation, the Abbot also has to welcome the visiting Black Monk from Harlem (Eugene Thomas, Ninja in USA), who will eventually be falsely accused of killing Peng Yi by Wang Chi-Chung (she was in fact killed by the ninjas using the Iron Tiger Claws we learned about earlier). After a brief Wang/Black Monk fight, one of the Shaolin monks tells Wang that the Black Monk is on their side… And naturally the movie then cuts to the Black Monk battling Shan Ran and the ninja clan on a beach, because why the fuck not!?!?! The Black Monk meets his demise on that beach. At The Black Monk’s funeral, Wang Chi-Chung (who just now realized his boy Chung Tin has gone missing) and the Abbot’s right hand monk are able to convince the Abbot that it is time to strike back at the ninja clan! It’s time to kick some ninja ass!!
The finale contains a ton of action, including bringing Chung Tin back to the side of good, the ninjas using their Water Spider Assault Unit and the final duel between Wang Chi-Chung and Shan Ran. With an ending that is about as final as things could get… which makes me all the more curious about the two sequels that apparently also starred Alexander Lo Rei as Wang Chi-Chung?!?!
I am not sure if I have more of an understanding of Ninja the Final Duel or less after my second viewing. What I do know is that the movie is extremely entertaining and one that I would happily watch again and again.
Feel free to happily read these Bonus Bullet Points…
- Name That Tune: Ninja the Final Duel features music from the Rocky and Rambo films and for a brief moment, “Ghostbusters”!
- AKA: Ninja the Final Duel is also known as Ninja’s Final Duel.
- Don’t Call It a Comeback: Some footage from Ninja the Final Duel was repurposed for the 1999 Rudy Ray Moore movie, Shaolin Dolemite. Both Ninja the Final Duel and Shaolin Dolemite were directed by Robert Tai.
