Bullet Points: Ed McBain’s 87th Precinct: Ice

I’ll be the first to admit that I haven’t read all of the 87th Precinct novels by Evan Hunter under the pen name Ed McBain. That doesn’t stop me from watching any of the 87th Precinct movies that I come across. I have enjoyed the novels that I have had the chance to read and will continue to read and you better believe I will keep watching the movies. Ice is one novel I haven’t read so I was going in fresh when I recently watched. Let’s take a look at the middle child in NBC’s set of made for TV 87th Precinct triplets, Ed McBain’s 87th Precinct: Ice.

• Re-Do – Ice follows Lightning in the series of TV movies for NBC, but there were a lot of changes. Dale Midkiff takes over as Steve Carella from Randy Quaid. Midkiff might not be as notable a name as Quaid, but his portrayal of Carella, a major character in the novels but easily the main star in the TV movies, is definitely a step up. Joe Pantoliano (Taxman) takes over for Ron Perkins as Meyer Meyer, and this time even though we lose some of the comedic factor of Det. Meyer, I will never be upset with Joey Pants in a movie. For some of the minor characters, Ice has Philip Arkin replace Ving Rhames as Det. Brown (a negative),Paul Johansson replace Alex McArthur as Det. Kling (a positive) and Michael Gross replace Eddie Jones as Lt. Byrnes (a positive). Overall the changes are for the better and most importantly, Carella’s deaf girlfriend was replaced by Andrea Farrell from Deanne Bray, who are both hearing impaired actresses.

• Murder Mystery – Being a movie about homicide detectives, people start dying pretty quickly. A popular dancer, from a Broadway style show not the kind of dancers you are used to watching, is murdered in an alley by a shadowy figure. Ice immediately gives the audience lots of potential suspects and we get to follow Carella and Meyer as they try to suss out the killer. There are some colorful characters including the rotund Emma Forbes and her partner Brother Anthony who doesn’t let his Catholic robes stop him from getting into a bar fight, he knows the rules. There is an obsessed fan that I guess has a unique look because everyone can recognize from a police sketch. It is really easy to hate the shady show producer (aren’t they all shady) and the dancer’s boyfriend seems to have too many answers. You don’t have to wait too long, half way through we find out the killer, and not only does the killer get theirs, but so do some of these other characters.

• B-Side – The 87th Precinct isn’t just Carella and Meyer so Ice gives a side story with Det. Kling and Det. Burke. You might be tuning out right about now, but let me tell you first that it involves a panty thief. NBC aired a TV movie in 1996 with a character credited only as Panty Bandit. Hats off to you, Philip Williams. To make things more interesting, the Panty Bandit unknowingly plays cupid for Kling and Burke. I was glad Kling’s now former model girlfriend plot line made its way into Ice, but she can’t compete with the Panty Bandit’s love connection.  

• Diamonds Are Forever – Ice kind of has a complex plot that involves scalping theater tickets, la cocaína pura más fina, and diamonds or ice for those in the know. I have already mentioned the numerous police officers, bad guys, red herrings and love interests and I didn’t even mention the baby of a prostitute that was born right in the middle of the 87th. All these elements probably make Ice a compelling read, and certainly up soon on my reading list, but they all get rushed in the movie. Any flaws in Ice are easy to overlook with the downtimes filed with rooftop chases, bar fights, shootouts and an overweight woman wielding a straight razor with deadly aplomb.

Ed McBain’s 87th Precinct: Ice can easily be watched without having read the book, but if you are like me you might feel bad for not having read it because you might feel like you missed out on a good one. You also don’t need to have watched Lightning as Ice stands on its own as an enjoyable police actioner. However, familiarity with the characters can help with the comprehension as to why some characters act the way they do. One thing you will need to do is check out the Ed McBain’s 87th Precinct: Ice Bonus Bullet Points.

• One More – The last of the NBC 87th Precinct movies Ed McBain’s 87th Precinct: Heatwave sees some returning actors like Dale Midkiff, but plenty of new ones.
• Bimbo Joke #1 – What does a bimbo put behind her ears to attract men? Her ankles.
• Favorite Toast – “Here’s to old movies. The awful ones are the most fun.”
• Familiar Names – Ice has some behind the scenes names I recognized. Director Bradford May also directed some of my favorite TV movies, Drive Like Lightning and Asteroid. Larry Cohen, maybe most well known for Maniac Cop but also did great work with blacksploitation and horror films, wrote the teleplay.
• Bimbo Joke #2 – How does a bimbo turn on the lights after sex? She opens the car door.