Bullet Points: The Slams (1973)
When I came across a poster for 1973’s The Slams on social media a few weeks back, two thoughts immediately came to mind… Jim Brown with a grappling hook makes for one badass poster, and how have I never heard of this movie before?
- Deal or No Deal: Things get off to a hot start as we witness a drug deal about to go down out in an oil field. The buyers and sellers conduct business inside a trailer, while their respective bodyguards keep watch outside… bodyguards that are quickly taken out by a sniper up on one of the oil rigs. Moments later a van pulls up outside the trailer, masked men exit the vehicle and trap the wheelers and dealers inside the trailer, before pumping cyanide gas into it! It’s mission accomplished for the three masked men, but when the driver, Curtis Hook (Jim Brown, The Running Man) learns his accomplices took the money AND the drugs, he’s none too happy. Hook wants no part of the drug business, and the mood quickly changes in the van. Hook realizing there could be trouble, fakes engine trouble, giving him an excuse to pull over and that’s where he gets his partners before they can get him… but Hook was not unscathed in the exchange and takes a bullet to the leg. Hook makes his way back to the van and manages to go to an abandoned amusement park by the pier. Hook stashes the briefcase filled with cash on top of one of the ticket taking booths, then he takes the drugs and dumps them in the ocean before he gets back in the van… at this point Hook has lost a lot of blood, he starts going in and out of consciousness, his driving becomes erratic and he crashes, barely making it out of the van before it explodes. The police are on the scene, Hook is taken to the hospital and once he is healed up… he’s sent to The Slams!
- Behind Bars: Curtis Hook arrives at his new home for the next one to five years… the Lincoln Heights Prison (aka The Slams). Hook barely makes it out of orientation before there’s an attempt on his life by one of the other inmates. The money and the drugs that Hook and his accomplices stole, were from the syndicate and they have put a hit out on Hook, so it really isn’t a surprise that some are looking to cash in. Hook has a meeting with the Warden, who has two FBI agents in his office… they try to cut a deal with Hook, but no dice. From there we get a series of tropes you’d expect in a prison movie… fight in the laundry room, an attack in the showers, guards on the take that turn the other way including the head guard Captain Stambell, and last but not least… racial tension between factions, with Macey on one side and the very connected, Capiello, on the other… you can probably guess who ends up caught between both! The most surprising thing about the entire movie was the character of Glover played by Ted Cassidy (aka Lurch from The Addams Family). In all my years on this big blue marble, I honestly don’t recall ever seeing Ted Cassidy in anything but The Addams Family, but I was ready for Jim Brown vs. Lurch!!
- Escape Plan: I have to admit, there were some lulls in The Slams that had me contemplating escaping before the end credits rolled, but I am glad I stuck with it. The once content to serve his time Hook, wants to escape ASAP when he sees his news reporter girlfriend, Iris Daniels, reporting on the plans to demolish the amusement park where Hook stashed the $1.5 million dollars he stole, so he can no longer wait years, he needs out now. With some help from Capiello, Iris and an old friend from the outside, Jackson Barney (Paul Harris, Truck Turner) an ingenious escape plan is hatched, but as you might expect things aren’t going to be easy, especially since Hook has so many enemies on the inside to contend with before he can make his great escape!
A forgotten slice of 70s cinema, The Slams‘ greatest strength was the coolness of Jim Brown. And even though Hook was no angel, compared to the cast of dubious characters, he was certainly the hero by default. The middle of the movie did get murky at times, but a good start and a good finish made The Slams worth watching for me.
Will these Bonus Bullet Points be worth reading? Only one way to find out…
- Familiar Face: The great Dick Miller (Gremlins and Chopping Mall) played a cab driver in The Slams.
- Directed By: The Slams was directed by Jonathan Kaplan, who also directed Truck Turner and White Line Fever.
- Ranked: While it was worth watching, of all the slams I have ever experienced, The Slams would rank on the lower end of slams for me, somewhere below Denny’s Grand Slam Breakfast. For the record, Onyx is responsible for my favorite “Slam” of all-time.
