Bullet Points: Gamer
Gerard Butler is an actor who I have always liked. I know he doesn’t get much support elsewhere. People seem to have liked him in 300 but after that he doesn’t get much of a good rap. Personally, I thought Olympus Has Fallen was awesome and Machine Gun Preacher was a really solid action film. At one point Butler was going to be in that God-awful remake of Point Break but somehow he dodged a bullet on that one. Good for him, I say. Ole’ Gerry has had his share of stinkers too. He has attempted to make quite a few chick flicks and rom-com’s but I’d rather eat a bucket of nails then watch most of them. No matter your feelings on an actor or actress, a good movie is a good movie. I can’t stand Jai Courtney but I still liked Jack Reacher. What I’m saying is that even if you don’t like Gerard Butler you should still check out his action flicks… except for maybe Gamer.
Synopsis: In a future world, where the world’s most popular video game pits death row inmates against one another in a Call of Duty-style scenario, Kable (Gerard Butler) is only a few sessions away from being the first person to survive 30 games and become a free man. But what he knows about the origin of the game could keep him from smelling the sweet taste of freedom ever again.
- Gamer Life: I’ve never been much of a gamer. I got into the Total War game series but other than picking up a controller at a friends house from time to time I’ve never owned any of the Call of Duty games. That might be the reason that the gamer stuff in the movie like the ‘save points’ or the one character “tea-bagging” another character never felt right to me. There are some mature people out there playing games, I’m sure, but when I think of gamers I just think of 13 year old boys with a mouthful of braces.
- Death Row is Exciting: It used to be that dudes just wasted away on death row before finally eating a rare steak, having a couple cold brews, and then sucking down a few hundred thousand volts. Hollywood seems to think that the future will see death row inmates being our entertainment. Gamer takes the “death row inmates playing for their freedom” in the same way the Death Race films did. It might be seriously dangerous but at least it’s better than dying a slow death.
- Old Spice Villian: Terry Crews seems like such a likable guy. He’s on TV every 16 minutes and he’s pretty funny when he’s pushing deodorant and starring alongside Sly and Jason Statham. What he does in Gamer just doesn’t work, on any level. For one, he’s supposed to be a badass but at the end of the film he gets punked out like a bitch. I don’t even remember what his name was. That is a clear sign that the character didn’t work.
- Cuttin’ Loose: I’ve finally found a dance scene in an action movie that is worse than the one in Spider-Man 3. In fact, this dance scene might be the worst scene I’ve ever seen.
- Poor Dexter: Holy crap. Michael C. Hall plays what should be described as the worst villain in movie history. At no point does his shtick make any sense or seem threatening. The whole purpose for him doing what he’s doing isn’t really that clear. If he’s so worried about Gerard telling on him he should have just kept him out of the game altogether and just let him die on death row. It’s all very, very stupid.
The Verdict: I can’t, in good conscience, tell you to watch Gamer. I like Gerard Butler but this movie is just pure crap. The villain doesn’t work at all. The hero has very little character to him and at no point did I care about his family or the outcome of the film in any way. Butler uses reverse psychology to kill the bad guy. If that doesn’t scream “don’t waste your time”, I don’t know what does. Not even a couple of decent action scenes could help this movie be anything more than a forgettable one night stand. I paid $2 for the film and I’d like a refund.
