Bullet Points: Devil’s Express

I am not sure about the rest of you, but when I hear that there is a movie about a martial artist battling an ancient Chinese demon in the subway tunnels of New York City, I immediately think… I need to see this movie! I did not need a trailer, I did not need any knowledge of the cast, I did not need to know who directed the film, because the premise alone was enough to get me on board with 1976’s Devil’s Express…

• Trip of a Lifetime: When we first meet martial arts instructor Luke, the hero of the film played by the awesomely named Warhawk Tanzania, he is sparring with Cris, a cop who got him out of a jam with a drug pusher a while back and the only “pig” Luke will tolerate.  When Cris tries to recruit Luke to join the police force, Luke shuts him down as he has no interest in becoming a pig… plus he is about to spend the next two weeks in Hong Kong where he will received advanced martial arts skills training. Luke is not going on this trip alone, he is taking Rodan, one of his students/friends with him. Rodan, played by the obviously named Wilfredo Rodan, does not have the best reputation. Rodan has been known to sling drugs around town and he runs with the street gang known as the Blackjacks.

• Hong Kong Phooey: Luke and Rodan arrive in Hong Kong for their advanced martial arts training and thanks to the power of the montage, they get their physical power up to the 9th degree in a matter of minutes. But Luke and Rodan now need to get their mind and spirit up to the 9th degree too and this requires them to go off into the wilderness and meditate. Luke takes to the meditation like a duck to water, Rodan… not so much. While Luke is in deep meditation, Rodan starts wandering around and comes across a burial site. Rodan lives up to the sterling reputation he developed in the States and steals an amulet from the grave. I would like to pause this review for a moment to offer a bit of advice for everyone reading this. If you have a friend who is shady and skirting the law in their home country, they are not the friend you should travel with internationally because it is almost a guarantee that some bad shit is going to go down. Resume review… Luke wakes up from his meditative state and goes looking for Rodan so the two can return home to New York City. But Luke and Rodan aren’t the only ones who will be making the trip from Hong Kong to NYC…

• The Demon: Rodan didn’t just rob any grave, he robbed the grave of a demon that was buried way back in the year 200 B.C. Moments after Luke and Rodan leave the burial site, the demon punches through his casket and the first thing on his mind is getting his amulet back. Than Due to some spiritual connection he has with the stolen amulet, The Demon knows he needs to catch the midnight ship from Hong Kong to New York City, but he also knows that it would be pretty obvious if a Demon was on board, so he inhabits the body of a Chinese businessman played by Aki Aleong of Braddock: Missing in Action III fame. When he arrives in New York City he is aimlessly wandering around the streets like he was Bernie Lomax in a conga line before he finally finds safe haven in the subway tunnels, sheds his Aki Aleong skin and soon begins a killing spree.

• Let the Bodies Hit the Floor: The dead bodies that are piling up thanks to The Demon are first suspected to be innocent bystanders caught up in the escalating gang war between the Blackjacks and the Red Dragons. One cop even theorizes that people are being killed by mutated animals living in the subway tunnels (I would have guessed C.H.U.D.s were responsible).  But when Rodan shows up dead in the subway tunnel, Luke immediately puts the blame on the Red Dragons, despite Cris the cop trying to tell him otherwise. This leads to a low impact almost slo-motion martial arts fight between martial arts “master” Luke and the leader of the Red Dragons. I’d like to point out that all of the martial arts action was subpar in Devil’s Express, but this fight really put a spotlight on how bad the fight choreography really was. Before Luke can deliver the death blow, the Red Dragon leader is able to talk some sense into him and takes Luke to a wise old man…

• The Demon Expert: What happens next is we get a poor man’s Keye Luke telling a poorer man’s Jim Kelly the origin story of The Demon, why The Demon is in the subway tunnels (he hates bright light) the importance of the amulet (if The Demon can destroy it he will be immortal and indestructible) and that our hero Luke is now the only one who can stop The Demon. So Luke does what any hero would do, he puts on some gold velour overalls and heads over to the subway, defies the cops orders and goes down and kicks some demon ass.

Devil’s Express does not have much good going for it aside from its unique premise. It is filled with low budget special effects, subpar acting, piss poor martial arts and yet somehow, someway it all works to create an entertaining 82 minutes of action/horror.

Now allow me to invite you to c’mon and ride this Bonus Bullet Points train…

• AKA: Devil’s Express is also known as Gang Wars and had the working title of Phantom of the Subway.
• Favorite Kill:  During a fight at the basketball court, Rodan steps on one of the Red Dragon’s throats and there is an almost volcanic like eruption of fake blood that comes gurgling out of the mouth of the downed Red Dragon.
• Sophomoric: Devil’s Express was Warhawk Tanzania’s second and final film. His first was 1975’s Black Force.
• Montage: There is a pretty lengthy montage that serves as a day in the life of Luke. We see him waking up with his girlfriend, getting a bite to eat with her, playing stickball with the neighborhood kids, bumping into random people on the streets and things end where they started with Luke and his lady in their bedroom where he proceeds to bed her.
• What Could Have Been: If The Demon showed up in New York City two years earlier I have to believe Paul Kersey would have killed him.