Bullet Points: Blood Money (1991)

Protip… if you are an aspiring screenwriter and you have a project titled Blood Money, you might want to consider renaming your project.

There have been more than two dozen movies with the title or alternate title of Blood Money dating as far back as 1933. There was 1974’s Blood Money starring Lee Van Clief and Lo Lieh. There was 1983’s Blood Money starring Chow Yun-Fat. There was 1996’s Blood Money starring James Brolin, Traci Lords and Billy Drago… and in 1991, PM Entertainment released their Blood Money movie starring Wings Hauser, Robert Z’Dar and Karen Black.

• Party Crasher: As the movie opens we get an inside look at a counterfeiting operation at the highest of highs after they just successfully printed $50 million dollars worth of perfect twenty dollar bills. Moments later we see the same counterfeiting operation at the lowest of lows when Miller Richardson (Robert Z’Dar, Young Rebels) sneaks in with the pizza delivery boy and starts shooting up the place with some help from his minions Tony and Mario. No lives are spared, especially Miller’s ex-girlfriend Mona (who after her relationship with Miller ended, she started shacking up with the guy who ran the illegal print shop). Miller decides bullets are not good enough for Mona and instead Miller slits her damn throat. Miller then has Tony and Mario pack up the counterfeit cash and soon our bad guys are heading back to Miller’s upscale home.

• Super Cop: There was one person who actually survived the illegal print shop massacre, unbeknownst to Miller… that survivor was Manny, the artist who created the funny money. Manny hid in a cardboard box (presumably made of bulletproof cardboard) when the bullets started flying and his cowardly ways proved to be a great survival technique. Now while Manny may have gone undetected by our bad guys, police detective John “Jack” Saxon (Wings Hauser, Deadly Force) had a hunch that somebody survived because when the police arrived, someone had turned off all the lights in the building. The shooters would have no reason to turn off the lights. The dead people couldn’t shut off the lights, so it was a logical conclusion on Jack’s part that somebody else had to do it. And this folks is why Jack Saxon has the reputation of being one of the best cops in all of Los Angeles. But his great detective skills are only half of Jack’s reputation… he is also known as a cop that is not afraid to use deadly force when necessary. Jack’s boss, Captain Brown, stated that of the 458 homicides reported in Los Angeles, Jack was responsible for 10% of them. I am not sure what the time frame these statistics were based on but killing 45.8 people even over the course of a cop’s entire career seems extremely high to me. It probably should come as no surprise to anyone who has ever watched an action movie featuring a maverick cop, that Captain Brown suspends Jack for four weeks without pay.

• Federal Aid: While Captain Brown may not have been a fan of Jack’s methods… Agent Barrett (Karen Black) the FBI agent tasked with tracking down the $50 million in counterfeit bills, doesn’t seem to mind that Jack shot up two seedy individuals at a pawn shop or the two stick up guys he killed at a restaurant when he was having a romantic dinner with his fiancée… because every one of Jack’s hunches has turned out to be right on the money. Barrett also has a hunch of her own that Jack knows more than he has shared with the Feds (because that is what maverick cops who are told to give their full cooperation to the FBI do). So she pulls some strings, offers Jack a raise and a promotion despite having no authority to do so, and gets Jack off his suspension and back on the case.
• Unforgettable:  Barrett’s hunch about Jack also turned out to be correct. Prior to his suspension when Jack and his partner Burt were assigned to investigate the victims of the shootings, they find themselves at Mona’s apartment looking for clues. Jack noticed a picture that Mona had tucked away with her and her then boyfriend Miller Richardson. I have never been in a situation where somebody had to save my life, but if I were in such a situation I imagine that I would NEVER forget that person because I would literally owe that person my life. When Jack was looking at the picture, you could tell he recognized Miller. Thanks to the magic of flashbacks we eventually learn that Jack and Miller served together in Vietnam and we see an incident where Miller saved Jack’s life… so it is really no surprise that Jack remembered Miller after all these years, plus Miller Richardson has a DAMN GIANT CHERUB FACE that anyone who ever saw him could not possibly forget… but for the purposes of this movie we will say Jack recognized him as the man who saved his life.

• Even Stevens: Jack is eventually able to track down his old war buddy Miller and Jack goes to Miller’s home as a friend. Jack tells Miller that he needs to get out of town and disappear, because when Jack comes back tomorrow he will have to come back as a detective with the LAPD and arrest Miller for all the heinous things he has done… in essence Jack is saving Miller from a life in prison and repaying him for saving his life back in Nam. But Miller is not having any of it… and since Miller is a really bad guy, he tracks down Jack’s fiancée, kidnaps her and this sets up our big finale where Jack and Miller go to war in the California wilderness.

Blood Money did not just use a recycled title, it was filled with recycled action movie characters and recycled action movie moments… but in the case of Blood Money, familiarity did NOT breed contempt…

Yes we have seen Wings Hauser as a play by his own rules cop, but he is really good at it.

Yes we have seen Robert Z’Dar as a DAMN GIANT CHERUB FACED bad guy, but it was the role he was born to play.

Yes we have seen exploding helicopters before, but can you ever have too many exploding helicopters?!?! I don’t think so, and I also don’t think there is such a thing as too many Bonus Bullet Points either…

• If You Ever: …wanted to see Robert Z’Dar interrupt a deal to sell counterfeit bills with a rocket launcher, then this is the movie for you.
• AKA: Blood Money is also known as The Killers Edge (no apostrophes needed).
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Wings Hauser fall down while attempting to ice skate with accompanying comedic music, then this is the movie for you.
• Prime Cut: I checked out Blood Money on Prime Video and all of the adult language was muted. Considering this was a PM Entertainment movie, I have to believe that some nudity may have also been cut out of the version on Prime since there wasn’t a boob to be found.
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Wings Hauser get pushed into a pool OR go to the batting cages, then this is the movie for you.
• Disturbing Quote: “I’m gonna tell your students what a nasty, vulgar, sexual thing you are” – Jack to his fiancée Dorothy, who teaches little kids how to ice skate.
• If You Ever: …wanted to see Robert Z’Dar practice playing the piano, then this is the movie for you.