No Surrender Cinema: Child’s Play (2019)

I’m going to admit something before this review even starts; I wanted to hate this movie.

Let me clarify that statement a little more.  I was INTENT on hating this movie.  Before it ever came out.  Before a trailer was seen.  Before the preview pictures of the “new and improved” Chucky hit the web.  I felt, in the deepest part of my heart, a sense of irrational anger about it.  This wasn’t going to be one of those bad movies that I love.  It was just going to be bad.  Still, because I’m…well, me, I knew I was going to have to see it.

Well, I saw it, and I was wrong.

Before I go into my close call with a self-fulfilling prophecy here, I’ll explain why it almost happened.  It’s no secret to those that I’m close with that the original Child’s Play franchise is my favorite horror series of all time.  It’s also known that I can quite often be a sentimental sap, and that also comes into play with Child’s Play.  I have an odd history with the original series, in that my love for Chucky stemmed from my fear of Chucky.  When I was a kid, I would often watch movies that were not exactly meant for my demographic.  While kids my age were lucky enough to watch The Karate Kid, I was watching Sho Kosugi and Michael Dudikoff kick ass.  When it came to horror, not much scared me, and though my family would do their best to regulate the viewings (the old “hide your eyes” or “leave the room for a minute” tricks to prevent me from seeing too much), but that damn doll scarred me in a way no other movie monster has before or since.  The first Child’s Play came out when I was 8 years old, and by that point I had already seen enough Jason, Freddy, and horror B-movies to give me nightmare fuel for a while.  So when my cousin brought the VHS home from the video store and said he had a “scary movie about a scary doll”, I thought nothing of it.  I also thought nothing of the fact that my cousin, who was in his 20’s and loved me dearly, but also loved to bust my balls, put my younger cousin’s My Buddy Doll (the very real product that the fictional “Good Guys” doll was based on) on the couch next to us.  We settled in, the movie started, and to be honest, to 8 year old me, it was boring.  Years later I understood it was an exercise in psychological horror and admired the way the film was structured, but with so much happening unseen or off screen, it didn’t really feel that scary.

Until that scene where Andy’s mom picked up the Chucky doll and realized that he had no batteries in him.  Chucky sprung to life in a fit of homicidal insanity, attempting to kill Andy’s mother and putting the final chapter of the film into motion.Not only was that the turning point in the movie, but that was a turning point in my life.  As Chucky raged on screen, I tossed the My Buddy doll aside and went running out of the room.  That scene did such a number on me that I couldn’t bear the sight of Chucky.  If the film came on television, I’d run out of the room.  God forbid a commercial for one of the sequels come on during one of my television shows.  It was so bad that I could no longer walk the horror aisle of a video store safely…the mere sight of Child’s Play 1,2, or 3 box art would send a chill up my spine.  I honestly don’t know what it was about Chucky that freaked me out.  My favorite movie at the time (and one of my favorites of all time) was literally a movie about grotesque looking children.  Yet while I was loving every second of The Garbage Pail Kids Movie, Chucky was haunting my young mind.  It wasn’t until almost a decade later, during the opening weekend screening of Rush Hour, that I caught a glimpse of Chucky on the big screen for the first time ever.  It was the trailer for the upcoming Bride of Chucky, and my reaction could not have been more opposite than it was that night.  “THIS is what I’ve been afraid of all these years?” I thought to myself.  Realizing that I had worked myself into a frenzy over nothing, I dove headfirst into the franchise.  It’s a story that I discussed last year with my good friend Richard Ewell on the Nerdy Laser Podcast (“How Chucky Got His Groove Back”), and one that I may explain another time here at BPA.

Now that you’ve gotten the backstory, let’s get into the real reason why we’re here; Hollywood’s penchant for remaking almost everything, and why there’s a new Child’s Play film in cinemas while the original franchise rolls on with a SyFy television series set to premiere in 2020.  This new film was made without the blessing of Don Mancini (the creator of the original film, who has been involved in every single Chucky movie as well as the aforementioned TV show), who disavowed the remake and flat out said it would do nothing to cause confusion in the marketplace, potentially keep money out of his pocket, and was bastardizing his creation.  Since MGM owns the rights to the original film (but not the sequels), they had a loophole that allowed this to enter development despite Chucky still being alive and well on-screen in modern times.  Combine Mancini’s thoughts on the matter with the millennial twist on the evil toy (he’s not just a kids toy, he’s more of an artificially intelligent tech toy that can sync up to other devices a la Alexa) and it had my eyes rolling immediately.  Still, even with all of the odds against it, I found myself sitting in the cinema opening weekend, waiting to see just how badly Hollywood had f’d up my childhood nemesis turned horror hero.

The basic premise of Child’s Play 2019 stays true to the original.  Karen Barclay (played by Aubrey Plaza as a younger version of the character from the ’88 version) is a single mother with a teenage child, Andy (Gabriel Bateman, also a shift in age as the original Andy was an 8 year old).  Andy is hearing impaired, friendless, hates his mother’s boyfriend Shane (to be fair, everyone but Karen can see that Shane is a dick), and is pissed that he and Karen just had to move.  Karen works in retail at Zed Mart, and one night, hoping to score some brownie points with her son for his impending birthday, she schemes her way into taking home one of the most sought after items on the market… the Buddi doll.

In this universe, the Buddi doll is much more advanced than the original Good Guys.  Created by the Kaslan Corporation (which is like Apple in that they have created a variety of products that allow for synchronicity, complete with a Steve Jobs-esque President), the Buddi doll is a smart toy whose programming allows it to evolve and adapt to routine things like holding conversations or bringing a child his schoolbooks.  This allows for the film to skip the voodoo plotline that brought the original Chucky to life, because this computerized Chucky is able to get in touch with his bloodlust via a bit of bad programming.  We see in the opening of the film that the assembly line in Vietnam is not the most glamorous work environment, and one of the workers decides that he’s had enough, so he simply turns off all of the Buddi’s safety features and then kills himself without telling anyone.  Of course, this is the doll that winds up in Karen and Andy’s hands.

Things start off innocently enough; the doll is obviously malfunctioned, but seems to work well enough that Andy will get used to it.  Chucky (who names himself that after mistakenly hearing Andy’s request that he name himself Han Solo) is more like a fish out of water, trying to fit in with Andy’s lifestyle like he’s a wacky new roommate or something.  Chucky’s antics are typically met with headshakes and shrugs by Andy, but they pair soon become accustomed to each other; Chucky visibly moreso.  When he witnesses things like Andy’s cat Rooney scratch him, or Shane verbally berating him, Chucky springs to Andy’s defense in extreme ways.  Once Andy realizes that his best friend has gone haywire, he tries to cut ties, but like a true Stage 5 Clinger, Chucky is still there every time he turns around.  His attitude shifts from craving Andy’s acceptance to torturing him with recordings of his deeds in the middle of the night, while Andy and his new friends Falyn and Pugg do what they can to cover Chucky’s tracks while simultaneously determining how to deal with him themselves.

Andy’s other newfound friend, Detective Mike Norris, whose mother lives in the building, starts to become a father figure to Andy while at the same time trying to figure out what all the weirdness is surrounding the new kid and his doll.  When the killings start and things hit a little too close to home, Norris becomes another one whose sights are set on Andy.   Of course, all of these incidents lead Karen to think that Andy is having a breakdown, because how could a toy be responsible for such heinous acts?  In an effort to keep him close and keep an eye on him, she takes him with her to work one night…the night that the new line of Buddi dolls is launching.  This creates a wild atmosphere for a climax that could have been much more fun given the circumstances, but ultimately came up short.

Since Child’s Play is a new release and many of you may not have had the chance to see it yet, I didn’t want to go too spoiler heavy here.  While the basic premise is well known by even the most casual moviegoer, there were enough little twists or alterations that differentiate it from its predecessor.  Still, this was like a Horror Movie For Dummies.  Chucky’s origin was a plot point lifted from an episode of The Simpson’s.  Gone are the clever references that the series was known for, and instead we get a shoehorned Star Wars joke all because Mark Hamill plays the voice of Chucky.  Wondering when Chucky is going to make his next move?  Just wait for his eyes to go red.  I guess Buddi dolls don’t come with a built in pokerface feature.  Speaking of the Buddi doll’s face, the design of it here is odd.  It looks more in line with a B movie killer doll used to cash in on the Chucky craze in the mid-90’s as opposed to something that feels fresh in 2019.  Oh, and Zed Mart, supposedly the Wal-Mart of this world?  It looks more like the local department store than the world’s biggest retailer.  

PS: Hey Hollywood.  I watch Stranger Things.  I enjoy Stranger Things.  That does not mean that because it’s so successful that I want EVERY.  SINGLE.  MOVIE. to focus on a ragtag group of Goonies wannabes banding together to battle the big bad.  It worked in It because that’s the premise of It.  We didn’t need to see it here.  

I don’t want this review to have me come off like Debbie Downer, because despite my grievances, there was a lot that I did like here.  Some of the kills were well done, including one particularly gruesome one.  Chucky’s fine line between savior and stalker led to some great moments of tension, such as when he’s standing in the dark corner of Andy’s room, replaying an incident with Rooney the cat over and over again.  Mark Hamill’s voice acting was enjoyable, and I hope that he continues on if any sequels are made.  I appreciated how they injected Mike Norris into the plot, rather than just have him be a cop on the job.  I even felt disappointed by some things that could have been built up better, such as Andy’s hearing impairment (honestly, if they never mentioned he wore a hearing aid, you’d never know the difference, and that is something that could have been used to develop some truly tense moments), or the climax at Zed Mart where Chucky syncs up to an army of Buddi dolls ranging from upgraded versions of his model, to a god damn Buddi Bear.  There was also a nice nod to a certain scene from Casinotowards the end of the film that astute viewers may pick up on.

Child’s Play 2019 is what I’d call a mid-range remake.  The good stuff is good, but a lot of the film seems scattershot and underdeveloped.  Some of the chances it took paid off well, but others it completely missed, if they were even attempted at all.  If we’re doing this on the 10 scale I’d give it a 6, which is pretty big seeing as how I was ready to write it off as an instant goose egg.  Don’t expect something that’s overwhelmingly great, but if you’re in the mood for an hour and a half of mayhem with Luke Skywalker’s voice as a soundtrack to it all, you’ll enjoy this new (but not all that improved) Chucky.