Bullet Points: The Rack Pack

You don’t have to tell me what the first thing you think of when you hear about a movie called The Rack Pack. It should probably be a movie with a mainly female cast that have a lot in common. There might be a movie like that out there, but that is not what I saw. I came across the 2018 movie called The Rack Pack and found it to be a family friend actioner with C. Thomas Howell as a bad guy… I’ll take it.

• The Rack Pack is told via narration in which the narrator recalls a story about his childhood.
• Did I mention that the narrator is Darrell Rackley, the writer and author of the children’s books the movie is based on?
• The Darrel Rackley childhood story first needs a flashback to the civil war time where we see a general hiding some gold with some terrible CGI dynamite.
• The general had a map to the treasure but a convenient off-screen horse fall onto a rock means he forgot all about the map and it is lost for many years.
• That is until it ends up in a random mystery box at an auction that little girl begs her mom to bid on and win.
• A mystery box that C. Thomas Howell, known as Ted in the movie, straight steals from the little girl. If you were on the fence about CTH, there is now way not to like him after watching his steal from some snot nosed entitled kid.
• Ted immediately recognizes the location on the map in the box and is on the hunt for treasure.
• Meanwhile, we finally meet young Darrell Rackley, his two brothers and their father at the funeral of his mother. The Rack Pack is bringing the sadness strong at the beginning. We have seen murder, theft and now a funeral.

• Darrel, his brothers and friends are mostly Army brats and love to play Army in the woods and call themselves the Rack Pack, presumably because of the surname Rackley and nothing to do with shelving, billiards or chests.
• The Rack Pack is having a great time in a camp out, but little do they know their location is very close to Ted, but for one night the boys can have some fun.
• Treasure hunting can take a back seat to an epic dirt clod fight. No CGI is needed for a dirt clod fight.
• Snipe hunting is a perfect prank… until it is not.
• Darrell and his friend stumble upon the map because the locations on the map are near to the woods the Rack Pack plays in, but they are also spotted by Ted.
• Mr. Rackley is concerned about his sons and goes to check on the location where Ted is at, and he gets himself kidnapped by Ted.
• Tammy, the one girl that is allowed to be in the Rack Pack, sees the kidnapping and she wants in on the action.
• Ted’s right hand man DJ gets punked by someone who still has to see a pediatrician, even though he said he wouldn’t.

• Three more hired goons, led by Antonio (played by director Thomas J. Churchill) are three of the most bumbling bad guys on film. Not that I would expect any better with that wig worn by Antonio.
• A museum chase is way more exciting than going to an actual museum, especially with booby traps.
• The Rack Pack really wants the audience to know what a punji stick is and especially what is sometimes covered in.
• It is human feces. The sticks are covered in human feces and The Rack Pack gets a kick out of saying poop sticks.
• Kids torturing adults, and I mean actual torture with physical pain and not just being typical annoying kids, is hilarious.
• The Rack Pack never rescues their dad, but a retired colonel who walks with a cane and has a bulldog does. How both made it down a ladder is never explained.
• The Rack Pack did capture the criminals so that was pretty cool. I would rather have my father than capture criminals, but you do you The Rack Pack.
• I like how The Rack Pack ends with a teaser for a future adventure. My fingers are still crossed that it will come
• I was disappointed the narration slowed down and we never saw him on screen again. And by disappointed I mean elated. I don’t need you to hold my hand, The Rack Pack.

The Rack Pack is a low budget family movie that is definitely not for everyone. You have to be ok with a movie that has kids as the lead characters, and even if you do they can still be annoying. I find the unknown child actors to be more than acceptable and I will watch anything with C. Thomas Howell. I kind of wish I was watching a different movie called The Rack Pack but I probably wouldn’t have any The Rack Pack Bonus Bullet Points.

• Favorite Question – “Crotch got your tongue?”
• Favorite Quote – “Smells like poo.”
• Favorite Comic Book – I don’t see too many movies with a The Mob of Zion reference let alone showing the book on screen.
• Favorite Gag – Fart jokes will never get old.